Many women have a long, detailed list full of the qualities they desire in a man, and sometimes this can backfire because there is no such thing as a “perfect” man. There is however, a man who is perfect for you. The one God has selected for you. When you look at your list of desired qualities, a few of them should jump out at you as non-negotiable. These are the things that you shouldn’t bend or compromise on. Whatever your must haves are, if he’s the one, you won’t have to compromise your non-negotiable s or ever feel like you’re settling. Whatever it is that you desire, pray about it, and let God send you the one He has for you.
1. YOU TRUST HIM: I’m not just talking about him being faithful to you. Although that is a huge part of the equation as well. Trust goes well beyond cheating. Do you trust him with your life? Do you trust his judgement on important issues? Are you comfortable sharing your goals and dreams with him, no matter how far fetched they may seem, and more importantly, do you trust that he’ll support you in any way that he can? Are you open to his views and hopes for the future as well? Think of trust like the foundation of the life you’re building together…if it’s shaky, everything else will be too .
2. HE ACCEPTS YOU THE WAY YOU ARE: Are you able to be your authentic self 24/7 with him? We’re talking bad days, good days, and yep, P.M.S. days. He accepts you for who you are right now, not who you want to be and never tries to change you. He respects you and everything you stand for. Your past may not be a pretty one, but he encourages you to share your testimony. He doesn’t try to silence you. He’s not ashamed of you or your testimony. We all have those sides to ourselves that we might not be too proud of, things we’d rather hide, and maybe even a slew of annoying habits, but you should never have to fake it in a relationship. You’ll know he is the one if he not only sticks around through it all, but falls in love with you even more in spite of it all.
3. HE IS YOUR BEST FRIEND: I hate to sound cocky, but the best marriages are the ones where the couple would count their partner as not only a partner, but their best friend as well. They don’t just love each other…they like each other. A lot. This doesn’t mean that you ditch your girls and expect him to cancel his weekly basketball game in order to go shopping with you. It simply means that he’s the first person you call when you need to talk something out or have big news to share. Additionally, it means that you genuinely enjoy spending time together.
4. COMMUNICATION IS KEY: Everything is not always peachy in your relationship, but the two of you know how to respectfully disagree with one another and nip it in the bud. You can tell each other the truth in a loving manner and be heard. You may not always like it, but you respect it. That both of you love each other enough to move beyond your disagreements in a mature manner and forgive quickly.
5. HE LISTENS TO YOU: He wants to know you. He’s interested in what you like and don’t like. He wants to know your ambitions, hopes and dreams. Why? Because he wants to know if your dreams mesh with his. You’re not exactly the same, but when it comes to the important things, such as children and family and career, your dreams need to align.
6. HE WANTS TO PLEASE YOU: He wants to see you smile, so he’ll do what he can to please you. Maybe he’ll buy you meaningful gifts or he’ll do the things or go to the places that make you happy. Just be sure that it’s a true desire to please, not a short-term impulse to impress you.
7. HE BRINGS THE BEST OUT OF YOU: You’ll like who you are when you’re with him because he makes you a better you, a kinder you, a loving you and a more patient you. In times of struggle, there are those who stress you out and those who calm you. He will do the latter, knowing how to make you smile when you’re feeling down and knowing how to instill peace in moments of chaos. It won’t always be perfect—you will still disagree now and then—but he’ll know how to create a calm before any real storm ensues.
8. ENCOURAGES YOU TO PUT GOD FIRST: He won’t be jealous because he knows that when you put God first, everything falls into place. He knows what God expects of each of you as individuals and you as a couple, and he will encourage you to place the Lord above all else.
We know that no one is perfect but don’t let that be your excuse to stay in a relationship with someone who might not be the one for you. When you enter a relationship with the person of your dreams, the two of you won’t ever want to stop talking about your love for each other and about the love of the One who brought you together.